Believe me when I say I get it! Living with depression for 40+ years has made me somewhat of an expert on feelings of emptiness, hopelessness, feelings of insignificance as well as an array of many other shitty feelings.
I think I was around 11 when I began wondering… what the fuck was wrong with me. I knew I was different, never fitting in. Always the kid on the outside, looking in. I could never understand how my friends were seemingly, always happy, while I justifiably, faked it! Nobody really seemed to like me, not even my family. My family dynamics were a mess, just like many other families, but I knew there was more to it with me. It wasn’t just situational. Sure, I had happy moments, but generally I felt empty, although not many saw that side of me. I was the funny kid, the “class clown “, the helper, the people pleaser, and on and on.
At a very young age, I knew I needed help. However, I was to embarrassed to tell anyone. I was afraid of being judged, and to insecure to stand up for myself.
I was always a “deep thinker” so I began to do my own soul searching. I was gonna cure myself! So my journey began!
I would read everything that I could get my hands on, hoping I could find the answers that would fix my head. I watch videos, read books about self-love, forgiveness, facing your fears, finding your purpose…the list goes on and on . Looking back, I realize that these were my first steps of survival, and although I didn’t see it that way at the time, I know now that it was all part of a necessary journey that brought me to where I am now.
The main thing I want to share with you, is that no matter how bad it feels, there are ways to help you get through it. I will share amazing tools and tips to help you get through it! I’m not gonna lie, this is not an overnight fix, but I’m positive you will find amazing tips/tools to survive your Painful Mind!